Official Transcript - University of the Canine
| Name |
Trout W. Stowell |
| Date of Birth |
Nov. 23, 1995 |
| Breed |
German Shepherd (50%), Terrier (25%) Beagle (25%) |
| Gender |
Male, Altered |
Coursework
|
|
| Basic Instincts |
F |
Basic Tricks |
C- |
| Panting |
C- |
Breeding |
I |
| Identifying Edible Things |
D- |
Licking |
A |
| Fetching |
F |
Gnawing |
D- |
|
|
| Remedial Instincts |
D- |
Pronouncing the Letter 'R' |
A |
| German I |
D+ |
German II |
D |
| Smarm Hunting |
A |
Advanced Smarm Hunting |
A |
| Walking in a Straight Line |
D- |
Running in a Straight Line |
F |
|
|
| Woofin' |
B+ |
Rawhide Seminar |
Pass |
| Barkin' |
C+ |
Anglo-Saxon Kings |
C |
| Whinin' |
A- |
Dealing with Cats |
C- |
| Growlin' |
C- |
Dealing with Foliage |
A- |
|
|
| Identifying Hazardous Things |
D- |
Identifying Your Human(s) |
D+ |
| Sulking |
A |
Advanced Sulking |
A |
| Performance Art in Lounging |
B+ |
Swimming - Salt Water |
n/a |
| Acting Hurt for Sympathy |
A- |
Indep. Study: Doorways |
D |
Summary
| Major |
Dogness (uncompleted) |
| Minors |
Smarm, Sulking |
| Thesis |
"Frogs - How do they keep getting away?"
(note: Thesis was abandoned before completion. Student briefly changed to
"The physical effects of prolonged marauding on palm fronds" but this was rejected
by the advisory committee as too silly.) |
| GPA |
2.08 |
| Degree(s) Awarded |
None (Failed to meet basic dog requirements plus disciplinary problems.) |
| Disciplinary Record |
Suspended once for eating his textbooks. Forced to withdraw from saltwater
swimming after inflicting serious clawing injuries on several instructors. |
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